Classroom 14A
by PsychoticBeyondReason
Summary: Iruka is out for a few weeks because of a prank that our favorite blonde ninja pulled. Too bad they're doing more daydreaming and storytelling then teaching. There's only very little about the classroom. It's basically stories about stereotypes.
1. Stereotype No1: Sasuke says Hn

I changed a bit in this story. It's still aimed at fanfiction stereotypes, though. Actually, I can barely stay on that topic anyways. I just added some paragraphs at the beginning and the end about the classroom.

What has changed:

Title

Summary

Part of the focus

Beginning

Ending

Italics are for thoughts and explaining hns.

Sticks are for Jiraiya so he knows which way to go.

Anything you may not understand is explained at the bottom.

That's all for now.

Disclaimer: I can not own anything related to Naruto like Rock Lee. Gaara OWNED Rock Lee in the Chuunin exams though.

* * *

-----------------Inside Classroom 14A

All the aspiring ninjas quickly took their seats inside the classroom. Iruka was out today, supposedly because a kid named Naruto immobilized him temporarily with one of his pranks. They were all wondering who their substitute would be.

_Creak_

_Troublesome, so many kids._

"Good morning class, my name is Nara Shikamaru and I will be your substitute for today."

A little boy stood up. He had green goggles over his forehead and an abnormally long blue scarf around his neck.

"Yes, Konohamaru?" Shikamaru drawled.

"What do you mean for today? Does that mean we will have two or three more teachers?"

"Well, it's more like fourteen more teachers besides me, and sometimes two teachers will come in at one time."

Moegi blushed. "Will one of our teachers be Uchiha Sasuke?"

"Hopefully not." Shikamaru mumbled. Shikamaru knew that he barely ever said a word, and didn't have ANY patience whatsoever.

* * *

What a beautiful day in Konoha! The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, and Asuma was contributing his daily amount of second-hand smoke to the village. Everyone was content with the day. Even emo Sasuke Uchiha was compelled to go outside for a stroll.

Now we all are informed that Sasuke barely ever says a word. Most of the time, all you will get out of him is a simple "hn", if even that. So how does anyone ever understand him? Who could possibly figure out what he is saying, or rather what he means from his "hn"s. Well, let's just follow him around and find out for ourselves, shall we?

* * *

--------------Ichiraku Ramen Stand

Sasuke decided upon visiting Naruto today. After all, he was always good for a laugh or two, and he needed some amusement. _"That idiot is probably stuffing his face with ramen right now." _Sasuke thought. And obviously, the most likely place to find Naruto would be Ichiraku ramen stand.

"Oi, Sasuke-teme!" Naruto hollered, while spewing out the ramen that he hasn't yet swallowed. Aw, he even has some newly-formed ramen stains on his jumpsuit. How pleasant.

"_And I am completely correct."_

"Hn" _Hasn't anyone ever taught you manners?_

"What are these manners you speak of?" Asked a dumbfounded Naruto.

"Hn" _Usuratonkachi_

"Hey, that wasn't nice Sasuke-teme!"

"Hn"_ Dobe_

"Huh?"

"Hn" _D-O-B-E_

"What about soap?"

Sasuke mentally slapped himself.

"Hn"_ D-O-B-E spells dobe, baka_

"Well R-A-Q-E-N spells ramen Sasuke, but what does it have to do with soap?"

Oh look, Sasuke has taken out a mallet.

"Usuratonkachi"

Naruto gasped. "Sasuke actually said WORDS!"

"Yes Naruto, I can speak. Now could you stop twitching on the floor?" Sasuke grumbled.

Naruto grinned. "Sorry, always thought you had laryngitis, is all."

"I think you've skipped too many academy classes, dobe." Sasuke scoffed.

"But I've always went to the academy on Mondays." Naruto stated.

_------------------_Naruto's POV

"_OH MY RAMEN! I've just killed Sasuke! But just in case, I better make sure..."_

"Oi Sasuke, are you dead?"

_Silence_

"Oi"

poke

"teme"

poke

"are"

poke

"you"

poke

"de-"

_**SMASH**_

"TEME! THAT WAS MY FOOT!"

* * *

---------- Yamanaka Flower Shop

After meeting with Naruto, Sasuke decided it was best to leave. You would too if you saw the strange red chakra tails spurting out from Naruto's ass. In addition to running away, he also decided to covert back to his usual "hns". Continuing his stroll around Konoha, he passed by the Yamanaka Flower Shop. Lucky Sakura and Ino, they got to see him pass by. Did I mention that they were having an intellectually stimulating conversation?

— Inside the shop

"Did you see Sasuke yesterday, Forehead-Girl?"

"Yes, didn't he look kawaii, Ino-PIG?"

"You're just jealous at the fact that Sasuke loves me!" Ino screeched.

"How could I be jealous of someone like you, PIG!" Sakura exclaimed.

"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful!"

They both soon went into fits of laughter after that statement. (A/N: Sakura and Ino start becoming more gregarious toward each other after the chuunin exams right?)

"Hey Sakura, isn't that Sasuke?"

"..."

"OH, SASUKE-KUN!" Ino and Sakura giggled.

"Hn" _Ino, Sakura, stop it. You're both being infuriating bimbos_ Sasuke hissed in hn form.

Now there comes a time in every shinobi's life when they must feel the wrath of a furious kinoichi. Now Sasuke didn't really mean that. He does think that they are annoying, but he would never say things like that to any of his comrades if it wasn't true. It's just that he didn't get his daily serving of tomatoes yet. (They kept him sane.) Now back to the story.

Ino exploded at that statement. "WHAT DID YOU SAY MAGGOT?"

Sakura was equally infuriated by that statement. "DO YOU KNOW WHO WE ARE!"

By now, Sasuke was already cowering in fear. "YES SIRS- I MEAN MADAMS!"

"GOOD! NOW GIVE US 5,000 PUSH UPS! IF YOU CAN'T DO THAT, THEN JUMP ROPE 8,000 TIMES!" Ino and Sakura cackled.

Wasn't it nice having friends who knew what all your hns meant?

* * *

------ Five hours later

Ino and Sakura were done having their fun. In addition to his workout, Sakura gave him a Tsunade-strength farewell punch after he was finished with their demands. At least he landed on a nice soft grassy hill with a perfect view of the stars.

"Look, there's Sasuke." stated a rather familiar, potato chip eating Akimichi.

"So troublesome, another person... What happened to you Sasuke?" asked our favorite lazy-as-hell guy.

"Hn" grumbled Sasuke.

Shikamaru was a smart guy, he could tell Sasuke was in a lot of distress.

"Well since you're here, you might as well star-gaze with me and Chouji. It's quite relaxing."

Chouji grunted, showing approval of Shikamaru's suggestion.

"Hn..."

Now it was nice having friends that know exactly what you mean whenever you say something, but it was nicer to be with acquaintances or friends who just knew what you needed after an exasperating day.

------- 2 hours later

"SHIKAMARU! GET YOUR BUTT IN THIS HOUSE BEFORE I GROUND YOU!"

"Yes mother."

_So troublesome._

* * *

Back at the Classroom

"Sensei?" Udon asked.

"Yes?" Shikamaru answered.

"You've been staring out that window for 6 minutes."

"Gomen, let's start class. Let's see, Iruka said it was jutsu show-and-tell day. Konohamaru, you can go first." Shikamaru motioned for Konohamaru to start.

Konohamaru went to the front of the class and got into position.

"Sexy no Jutsu!"

_Poof_

"BAKA!"

* * *

Author's Note

As you see, the beginning and the ending has changed. This story does not take place in any particular time in the story. I'm just exploiting characters. Any other questions, just ask. Any complaints? Just give me some constructive criticism, I'll take it. If you have flames, then just write it on a $100 bill and I'll tell you where you can drop it off. :)

Please review to tell me what I should fix or do better.


	2. Stereotype No2: Sakura's Personalities

Stereotype Number 2: Sakura has a VERY explosive Inner-self.

Disclaimer: I don't own Inner Sakura. Actually, I don't own crap. Dammit...

* * *

Classroom 14A

"Good morning Sakura-sensei, Sasuke-sensei."

"Ohayo class!" Sakura chimed.

"Where's the dobe?" Sasuke questioned.

"Uggh, stuffing his face with ramen again probably." Sakura groaned.

"We can't start the class without him. He has the lesson plan."

Konohamaru spoke. "Sensei, when will class start?"

Sakura thought up a plan.

"Well how about I tell you a story? It's about my inner self coming out."

Sasuke groaned. "I don't wanna relive it."

"WELL TOO BAD!"

* * *

"Oh my god, Sasuke-kun! Don't you just love my hair? It's soo soft, much better than Ino-pig's hair! Oh, did you see the herbal essences commercial with Jadyn Maria? Her hair was so completely fabulous that just I HAD to switch shampoos and conditioners! Oh, I also went to the salon to get some highlights! Some strands of my hair are exactly half a shade lighter than the rest, but you can only see them if you squint your eyes in a VERY bright room. And you know ----"

Sigh

Sakura was babbling on about her hair, for the FOURTH time today.

"Don't you just LOVE my cuticles? I also got my nails done while I was at the salon! Guess what color they are!" Sakura stated while flipping her outrageously pink hair back. She extended her hand, showing her "lovely" pink cherry-blossom fingernails to the one and only Sasuke Uchiha.

Yes, Sakura was acting like a complete idiot, even though her intelligence is considered to be above average. But, what force is strong enough to make us act so psychotic? Oh right, it's testosterone...

"I also bought some new shoes! The color is an adorable mix of lilac... AND LIGHT PINK! I just ----"

Sasuke considering his options. Sasuke could just insult her and hope that she goes away. But after his last experience at the Yamanaka Flower Shop, he wasn't gonna take his chances.

---------------- Flashback

"Hn" _Ino, Sakura, stop it. You're both being infuriating bimbos_ Sasuke hissed in hn form.

Ino exploded at that statement. "WHAT DID YOU SAY MAGGOT?"

Sakura was equally infuriated by that statement. "DO YOU KNOW WHO WE ARE!"

By now, Sasuke was already cowering in fear. "YES SIRS- I MEAN MADAMS!"

"GOOD! NOW GIVE US 5,000 PUSH UPS! IF YOU CAN'T DO THAT, THEN JUMP ROPE 8,000 TIMES!" Ino and Sakura cackled.

---------------- End Flashback

He needed to do something to get away from this nutcase, though. He couldn't just wait until she was finished with her ramble, it could take days! Sasuke was drowning in the pool of pink. He felt so irritated, and he would probably die early from all this stress. Happy 43rd birthday Sasuke.

"---- and isn't my skin so soft? You know wash it with milk every day!"

Okay, a Tsunade-strength punch didn't seem so bad right now. Last time he landed on a grassy hill with Shikamaru and Chouji. Why not test his luck?

"Sakura?" Sasuke mumbled.

Sakura giggled. "Yes, Sasuke-kun?" she chimed.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH!"

--------------Inside Sakura's Mind

_CHA! HOW DARE HE CURSE AT US! I TOLD YOU WE SHOULD HAVE TAKEN CARE OF HIM LAST TIME! _

"NO! Don't you dare hurt my Sasuke-kun!"

_THAT'S IT! I'M COMING OUT! I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU AND THIS SASUKE!_

"No! Don't!

_I'M LEAVING AND NEVER COMING BACK EVER AGAIN._

* * *

"Sakura?" Sasuke stepped away from the two nearly identical kinoichi. One had the words "Inner Sakura" on her forehead.

"Yes, Sasuke-kun?" Sakura answered sweetly, smiling as if nothing was wrong.

"Yes, Sasuke-TEME?" Screeched Inner Sakura.

Sasuke gulped. One Sakura was enough. But TWO!

"Who is that?" Sasuke questioned.

"CHA! I AM INNER SAKURA! But you can call me Shannaro!" Man, does she have mood swings.

"But Shannaro isn't a-" Sasuke got cut off.

"JUST CALL ME SHANNARO! CHA!"

"La cucoraCHA! La cucoraCHA! La, la-la-la-la-la-la!"

"You're late dobe." Sasuke said. _Thank you, dobe!_

Naruto grinned. "Sorry, I was eating the new silkworm flavored ramen. It tasted a lot like peanut butter..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

Naruto started to observe his surroundings. Something seemed weird to him, but he couldn't put his finger on it. Wait, he's got it!

"Sasuke did you spike my ramen again? There's two Sakura's in front of me!"

"No, I was planning to do that tomorrow." Sasuke pulled out his bottle of beer.

"Oi teme, where did that Sakura with the letters on her head go?" Naruto asked.

"Oh, crap." Sakura ran off.

* * *

With Shannaro

_Finally, I got rid of those three._

Just then, Shannaro felt a nudge on her foot.

"CHA! GET OFF OF ME YOU MUTT!" Shannaro yelled.

"SAKURA! What are you saying to Akamaru!" Kiba grunted.

"You're mutt was bothering me, and I'm not Sakura! My name is Shannaro! CHA!" Shannaro complained.

"Don't call him that SAKURA!" Kiba growled.

"I'll do anything I want!" Shannaro kicked Kiba in the shin and ran away, laughing maniacally.

"MUHAHAHAHA!"

_

* * *

Lucky he didn't follow me. Shannaro thought._

"Hi Sakura!" Chouji chirped while consuming his potato chips.

"MY NAME'S SHANNARO, FATTY!" Shannaro declared.

"Say that again..." Chouji dared her.

"Fa-at-ty." Shannaro hissed.

"ARRGGH!"

"Uhh, time to run! See ya ! Bye!" Shannaro said as she ran.

* * *

Shannaro was panting by now. Who knew she could get into so much trouble?

Shannaro chuckled lightly to herself. She started to remember all the good times she shared with Sakura. Sakura was annoying at times, but she was a fun host. Shannaro was starting to regret her decision. She hated fighting with Sakura. She hated walking. She hated being out of Sakura's body. And she HATED the annoying mosquito trying to suck her blood.

"ARRGGHH!"

_SWAT_

"Sakura..." Shino lifted his arms, readying for battle.

"I'M SHA- Never mind, I'll just run for my life now."

"..."

* * *

With Sakura

"Oi Kiba, Chouji, Shino! Have you've seen well... me?"

"We sure have Sakura..." Chouji stated quite menacingly.

"Uhh, g-guys?" Sakura stuttered.

"Gatsuuga!"

"Baika no Jutsu!"

"..."

* * *

Sakura was covered in bruises. At least Shino had the decency not to use any jutsu against her.

"Sakura?"

"Shannaro? I'm sorry!"

"No! It's my fault!"

"Sakura!"

"Shannaro!"

"Sakura!"

"Shannaro!"

They hugged in front of a sunset, with a wave crashing on to a beach.

"Hn" _Get a room. _Sasuke hned.

_SMACK_

Sakura was holding a very large stick, clad in her toothy smile.

Shannaro wept. "I'm so proud of you!"

"Are you coming back?" Sakura asked hopefully.

"Of course!" Shannaro declared.

* * *

------------Back in the Classroom

"Then Shannaro and I lived happily ever after!"

"Did you have to say the curse?" Sasuke mumbeled.

"Uhh----" Suddenly, the door opened.

"Dobe?"

"Oi Sakura-chan, Sasuke-teme! Sorry I'm late!"

Naruto was in the Indian Sitting Position, dragging himself along the floor with his hands.

"Dobe, what are you doing?"

"Naruto, get off the floor it's filthy."

Naruto grinned. "I know! I promised to help him clean the floors!"

"With your ass?" Sasuke asked.

"Yah, he didn't trust me with the mop."

"..."

After a long silence, Sasuke finally spoke.

"Naruto, you have the lesson plan?"

"Yep, straight from Iruka himself!"

Sasuke read the note.

- - - - -

Lesson Plan: Teach students a new jutsu

- - - - -

"Okay class, since the dobe has finally arrived, we will be teaching you a new taijutsu move. It is Konoha's most sacred technique. Naruto here will help me demonstrate."

* * *

I know, the quality of this story is pretty bad. I'm thinking of stopping it short.

I know that Inner Sakura is called Inner Sakura. I think the way I wrote it made it easier to distinguish from the two.

Anyone here have eaten silkworms? I was at this place in Beijing filled with food. Bug food. I think it was a bug festival. My relatives (Children) and I tried the scorpions. Only my sister was brave enough to swallow the entire bug. The others and I just ate the tails. I SWEAR they were prancing around in my stomach. We tried silkworms too.. Unwillingly. My dad said he was going to give us ants, and he came back with silkworms. BIG DIFFERENCE! Me and my sister didn't want to waste money, so we ate them. I stopped after my first one. They tasted like peanut butter...

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Help Wanted

Need critics to write constructive

reviews.

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